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funny ways to save $1,000,000I am almost positive that you have never even considered trying these funny ways to save money. In fact, I’m willing to bet my first born son that you haven’t (if I lose this bet, joke’s on you LOL).

All jokes aside, these really are some funny ways to save money that both make sense and work (for those of you who are skeptical). Some may call these weird ways to save money or perhaps downright outrageous ways to save money.

I get it, no one clicks on a click-batey-title like “Funny Ways to Save Money…” thinking they are going to actually learn how to save money. But I guarantee you will not only walk away from this little lesson on saving money laughing, but also with a few more duck bills in your wallet.

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So let’s get to it then. 13 funny saving money tips that are about to make you just a little bit richer.

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Get Richer With These Funny Ways to Save Money

Sounding crazy yet? Good. Make sure to keep reading because the explanation of each funny way to save money says it all.

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Your husband can never do the grocery shopping

husband grocery shopping

You heard me ladies. When your man comes home and offers to do the grocery shopping, it’s a money trap. I have yet to look at a receipt after my husband returns from a grocery shopping trip and think, “Wow, he saved us a lot of money today!”

No, think name brand, eye-level shelf items being swiped into the cart in quantities of 10 single-packs (that makes me cringe). If there is a buy one get one free sale? Consider the free one left behind.

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love when my husband offers to go grocery shopping. In fact, I am an extreme introvert that rarely sees the sun. But looking at the shopping receipt after each trip makes me rethink life as I know it.

Recently, we started using Walmart Grocery to place our grocery orders online. “You order fresh groceries, Walmart does the shopping and loads your car for free.” I can easily choose the deals I want, but still have my husband pick up the order when he goes into town!

Plus, preordering our groceries keeps me from buying extra food that we don’t need. I can stick to our weekly budget every time we shop this way! Give Walmart Grocery a try and get $10 off your first order!

Don’t sweep or vacuum your floors

Toddler feeding dog

If your first thought is “Yuck! Who doesn’t clean their floors?” then you’re probably not saving the most money possible in your home.

I have a 3-year-old son. I have a dog. Therefore I have a free, daily cleaning service, courtesy of my toddler throwing food everywhere and my dog cleaning up his trail.

Also hello, why would I need to buy dog food when my dog has an open smorgasbord all day every day? If it’s healthy enough for my son’s tummy, it should be fine for my dog. Am I right?

Cha-ching. Money saved!

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Never fully finish the laundry

Don't do laundry

Most moms out here are already on top of this funny way to save money, but do they really know that it’s saving them money? I think not.

So I am here to tell you that it’s okay to never finish a load of laundry before the next one starts! Think about it. Who hosts parties with a couch that is constantly mounded with clean laundry? I mean, at least it’s clean laundry.

But consider how much money you can save by never hosting another party in your home. Tons.

Related: How to Save Money for a House [From $0 to $7,000 Down Fast]

Go paperless at home (oh yes, completely)

Go paperless

Going paperless at home can save you hundreds of dollars every month. I’m not just talking about ditching paper towels, plates and newspapers; I’m talking about ditching feminine products, baby wipes and toilet paper.

Hey, if you’re going to make this work, you have to go all out and ditch all paper products in the home. It’s totally possible and who has these supplies when you need them most anyway? Yeah, not me.

Related Post: Going Paperless At Home Can Save You $225 Per Month

Stop making love

Stop making love

I know how this works. Some women are already on top of this little money-saving trick while others say they could never go without sex. I won’t tell you which side of the coin I am on because that’s getting a bit personal.

I will tell you however that eliminating intimacy is one of the top money saving tips in this entire list of funny ways to save money. Let me try to explain this nicely.

What does sex lead to much of the time? Or should I say, what is 100% the result of sex? Kids. Kids are the result of sex.

Each child costs about 1 million dollars over his/her lifetime. So stop having sex and save a few million bucks. You literally couldn’t save that much money any other way!

Allow the trash to be “filled to overflowing”

Don't empty the trash

When the trash is “full” and you’re about to flip your top, just grab an old shoe and crush that pile of stench down as far as possible. Who cares if you have to wear a clothespin on your nose through week two of mission “don’t empty the garbage.” At least you’re saving a couple bucks on garbage pickup day (if you pay by the bag like I do).

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Start a new fad diet at least once a month

Go on a fad diet

Nah, I’m not telling you to start a diet because you need to lose weight. I’m saying that when dieting we tend to buy tons of healthy food to get the ball rolling.

If you’re anything like us, we just start a fad diet, buy all the healthy food, stock the refrigerator and food shelves with fresh fruit and veggies and then watch it all go to waste as our diets crumble.

How the heck does that save money, you ask? Well, for us, if we stock our shelves with healthy food and then watch it go to waste, we kind of feel really bad about buying more food that we do like.

So for a good long time, it looks like we are fully stocked on groceries, but really we’re just eating cereal and mac n’ cheese which is about as cheap as it gets.

Burn alive or freeze to death in your sleep

Freeze to death

If you’re struggling to pay the utility bills, then just keep the heat off in the winter and the AC off in the summer overnight. Now along with the millions of dollars you just saved by having no more kids, you’ve got to agree that the utility bill will look great next month.

Related Post: 7 Ways To Save Money On A Tight Budget From Moms Like You

Make introvert friends only

Make friends. Yes, make lots of friends! But there is only one rule when you’re trying to save money. Make sure that those new friends are introverts. That way you never have to actually go out and do things together. Because doing things means spending money!

Stop worrying about the last time you showered

Dirty feetHave you ever made it to Thursday and thought, have I showered yet this week? No? Oh. Me neither.

Well, if you do struggle to get in your daily shower, don’t sweat it! Literally, because then you will stink. But hey, at least you’re saving on the water bill!

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Eat only what your toddler eats

Mac and cheese

If a toddler can live on the marshmallows from Lucky Charms, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and mac n’ cheese, then so can you. And if you think about it, it’s really cheap to eat only what your toddler eats. In fact, you can even eat the actual cereal that your toddler left behind after picking out all of the marshmallows. That is, if he hasn’t fed it to your dog already.

Related: How To Save Money As A Kid [Parents, You Can Help!]

Save all the things


Having trouble decluttering your home and just letting go of the things you don’t need? Well you’re in luck. Just keep it! If you need to use that one thing in ten years down the road, you’ve saved yourself the trouble and expense of buying a new one. Money saved is money saved.

Live Love Laugh (it’s not what you think)

your funeral

Yes, living, loving (but not having sex) and laughing is great, really! But funerals are expensive. So please don’t die because that’s a lot of money coming out of a loved one’s pocket. Just not yours, because you’d be dead.

Funny Ways to Save Money That Really Work

So what did you think of these funny ways to save money? If you have not picked up on the sarcasm yet then I’m doomed. But if you have and you can still see how to apply some of these little changes to your life and save more money, then my mission is accomplished!

Please join in on the sarcasm and add some of your funny ways to save money to the comments below. I would love to have a good laugh!

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funny ways to save money

Weird ways to save money that work

funny ways to save money

I created The Pay At Home Parent in February of 2018 to help you be a successful home-based business owner, blogger or side hustler. As a wife, mom and frugal homemaker, I still make a full-time income on a part-time work schedule and I know that you can too!

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